Subterfuge
by Jane of Volterra
Summary: What if Jane and Alec are forced on their worst mission yet accompanied with Felix and Heidi to visit their least favourite place on earth, Forks, and attend school to spy on the Cullen's "devil spawn?" Surely a prospect they will not enjoy at all.
1. Chapter 1

**A strange idea I got from my story August Harvest, what if Jane and Alec had to go undercover at *gasp* school? Just something I had on my computer, not sure if it's any good. If there's intrest and good feedback then i'll post the rest, if not this will be a oneshot. Thanks for reading!**

"Hello Jane, Alec." Nodded Aro as the twins presented themselves in the throne room. They were nervous; their master had summoned them urgently. Had they done something wrong?

"I have a highly important mission for you both that will require your utmost cooperation." Alec squeezed his sister's hand in anticipation. Whatever this mission was it was obviously very special.

"I would like to put you on a temporary surveillance job in Forks, Washington."

Jane gasped in surprise. She didn't want to be within a hundred thousand kilometres of the Cullen's or their devil spawn. Alec opened his mouth to protest but was quickly silenced by a reproachful glare from Aro.

"Don't be so judgemental, little ones. Demetri and Heidi have agreed to go with you as your "guardians" while you enjoy your time watching over Rensemee Cullen at Forks Elementary. We want to know that the Cullens are not trying to create any more dangerous hybrids we don't know about. Befriend Renesmee and find out about the Cullen's. You have a week."

"You have _got _to be kidding me." Laughed Alec, "are you serious?" Jane kicked him in the shin as Aro kept a non-joking expression. That was a little awkward for everyone involved, so Aro swiftly left the room.

"Oh...he wasn't joking." Sighed Alec, crestfallen.

"Come on, we have a job, let's go do it." Jane dragged her brother out of the room to pack.

"No Alec," Sighed Jane, grimacing. Her brother had sneakily tried to smuggle three pairs of the same outfit into his suitcase. "The humans are unobservant, but you can't wear the same clothes every day of the week."

This annoyed Jane too, but she knew clothing was of a minority importance, and it would only be for a week. She could wear her favourite outfit as soon as she got home from "school" if she wanted. But still, she sighed longingly at her white shirt, purple dress, white socks and shiny black shoes. But at least she could wear her locket everyday. Once Alec and Jane had finished packing, she said a sad goodbye to her kitten Muffin. She was going to miss her, but it was only going to be a week. At least Muffin would be safe in Volterra, just in case the Cullen's tried to eat her in Forks. "Vile vegetarians." She thought as they said goodbye to the rest of the guard.

Once the shiny black limousine pulled up at the castle, Felix, Heidi and the twins sped off to the airport where a luxury plane waited on the airport. They climbed onboard without looking back and prepared for a long, boring journey.

After one incredibly mind-numbing plane trip and another car (in one of Felix's loaned Ferrari's) ride from the Washington Airport, they arrived in front of a mouldy old flat on the outskirts of Forks. Alec's mouth dropped open.

'We're staying here?"

"Yes," replied Heidi, "But it's not like you actually have to sleep here, it's just a place to keep your stuff and change clothes."

"But-"

"It was the only thing left, Alec." Snarled Felix.

"Okay, whatever." He backed off, hands raised in surrender.

"Can we just go inside please? It's raining in case you haven't noticed." Complained Jane. She twisted open the doorknob and was greeted with a rather melancholy looking room complete with a leaking roof, peeling wallpaper and a TV set that looked about a thousand years old.

"Hmm." She shrugged it off and went to put away her clothes. What a fun week this would be.

The flashy red Ferrari pulled up outside Forks Elementary and was welcomed with awed stares and admiration. Felix figured that if he was going to have any fun this week, he might as well make the humans jealous.

Jane and Alec climbed out of the backseat as Heidi pecked them on the cheek goodbye and handed them their backpacks, Alec's a sleek black backpack and Jane's a pink Hello Kitty backpack, supposedly a gesture of a loving mother to any onlookers as she walked them to their classroom.

Felix waited in the parking lot, revving the Ferrari impatiently as he saw many dads' admiring Heidi's good looks. He snickered to himself from behind tinted windows.

While they walked she spoke with lips moving fast and quickly as a secret warning to the twins, which went something along the lines of "Behave or die."

When they reached the classroom, they met up with the fifth grade teacher who was going to be taking Jane and Alec's classes for the next week. She seemed like a nice woman, but perhaps a little too nice. While Heidi was talking to the teacher, Alec wondered what his new class would be like whilst staring into space, and from what Jane could see on her tiptoes through a window in the classroom, the class looked highly undisciplined. She shuddered internally. Ew.

The bell rang, and it was time for the "kids" to say goodbye to their "mother."

Heidi gave them some sweet reminders to enjoy their day, and that she would pick them up at three thirty out the front of the school. Jane felt like clinging onto Heidi and refusing to let go, the thought of school seemed more and more unappealing by the second. She just wanted to go back to Volterra and have fun instead of pretending to listen to a teacher and learn her adjectives for the billionth time.

But the teacher pulled Alec and Jane into the classroom and Heidi walked off.

Plan foiled. Damn.

"Hello, class. Today we have two new students, their names are Alec and Jane and I hope you will be very kind and welcoming to them, they have just moved all the way from Italy." The class hissed to each other. Firstly, being twins was unusual, but the way they dressed was funny too. Alec was wearing brown pants, black shoes, a blue sweater and a white shirt and Jane was wearing her white shirt, purple dress, white socks black shoes and of course, locket. The rest of the children in the class were all wearing jeans or tracksuits, which the twins found rather odd too. Luckily the twins had remembered to put on contacts this morning, or this day would not go well at all. "Alec, Jane, would you mind introducing yourself to the class?"

Caught momentarily off guard, Alec quickly composed himself and named off the few human-friendly hobbies he liked, which were drawing, reading and running games. Jane rattled off piano and reading, but got stuck on her third one. She realised she only had two interests that wouldn't get her locked up in a mental asylum immediately should she mention them in front of the class. But then she quickly came up with one, horse riding. Surely heaps of kids would do that here?

She was saved, and the twins moved to take seats right at the back.

"Wait, can you tell us anything else about yourselves? Would the class be able to ask you some questions?" Alec groaned internally. Oh, brother.

"I'll ask the first one." Smiled the teacher. "Tell us a bit about your family? Where are you from in Italy?"

"Well," began Alec in his well-rehearsed story, "Our mother is Russian and our Father is Italian. So we live in Italy together." This was partly true. Heidi wasn't Russian, but she loved visiting. It would fit. "In Italy we live with our.... grandparents.... cousins and older siblings." Jane took over from that.

"In Italy we live in the mountains on the outskirts of a big city and you can see right over the entire town. We don't go to school, our Mother teaches us while our Father works." Surely that would cover it, wouldn't it?

But heaps of waving hands shot up as the class wanted to ask the weird foreign visitors questions. The teacher selected randomly.

"What do you like to draw, Alec?" He bit his tongue. Usually he liked to draw things like Volturi hunts, wars or their deaths.

"Uhhh.... I like to draw my...family?" it came out a bit more of a question than an answer. Focus, he reminded himself. Keep up the act.

"What books do you like to read?" What books _did _they like to read? Usually ancient leather bound volumes written in strange, occasionally extinct languages or philosophies or medical journals or old travel or mission documents the Volturi guard had written themselves on their expeditions.

"I like to read... fantasies or adventure books." Alec answered. That was partly true. But Jane was itching to say that she enjoyed reading Plato, but she knew it would just look suspicious.

"What do you play on the piano?" one kid asked, "'cause I can play chopsticks." He boasted. "Big deal" thought Jane.

"I play Tchaikovs-" she was interrupted by a warning pinch by her brother as the teachers eyes widened. "ky." She finished. The class was momentarily confused, but not understanding just thinking it was some weird international thing, they moved on to continue annoying the twins with their questions. Thank god the bell rang forty-five minuted later, signalling time for a break.

"Saved by the bell, how cliché." Thought Alec.

During the break, they were ignored; the novelty had quickly worn off with the students. The twins were relieved as the hid behind a sports shed to change their contacts, which were beginning to dissolve quickly.

"Jane, what were you thinking?" Alec asked irritably. "Telling them you can play Tchaikovsky? The teacher obviously noticed. Heidi is going to _murder _you."

"But since when do _you _like to draw your family? That was the biggest lie ever. At least I was telling the truth!"

"Did you ever think for one second, Jane, that perhaps this isn't a good situation to be telling the truth?"

Their arguing went on for a while until they had finished replacing their contacts and thrown their "recess" in the bin. As they were walking back to class early, they noticed who they thought was definitely the girl they were looking for.

It must have been Renesmee, she had inherited her mother's horrible looks and her father's annoying way of speaking.

Under her breath Jane whispered to her brother "Aww...the little baby's all grown up, what a tear jerking sight. Not." They both laughed quietly together. Now all they had to do was strike up a close friendship with the Loch Ness Monster.

"Not a hard task is she inherited her mother's brains." Thought Alec to himself, smiling evilly at his sister. This was going to be easy as cake.

**Please let me know what you think, other wise nothing will happen to this story. If you like and want another chapter - you know what to do, click review! (it rhymed, doesn't that make you want to review even more?) thanks for your support!**


	2. Chapter 2

WOW! I'm overwhelmed by the positive responses guys! Heaps of alerts, reviews and favourites – keep it up! YOU ARE MY HEROES! 900 hits and some 394 visitors on all my stories! Mostly on this one! But only three reviews? That was a little dissapointing considering that I just wrote you all a 2000 word chapter =( I'm sure you all have wonderous excuses though. For example "My dog ate the fanfiction URL!" or "I was enjoying this caramel slice too much that I quickly became sidetracked, and by the time I'd finished I realised that I had finished reading your story and gone onto a fanfic where Edward becomes pregnant! Too late to go back and review now! I need some more caramel slice!"

I forgive you all =) no hard feelings!

Thanks for the great response though! =) please keep it up! If you read this far through my authors note without throwing something through the screen in your anticipation to read this exciting chapter - please post at the end of your wondorous and amazing review (even if it's a flame) "Oh look a purple jellyfish!" tee hee :P

There is also a splendiferous new poll on my profile about what type of stories you would like to write that are Volturi-centric! please vote if you like Pandas.

**IMPORTANT: just to clarify, as this is MY story, Renesmee has no recollection of the Volturi visiting Forks, so Jane, Alec, Heidi and Felix's identities are somewhat safe. Let the story begin.... (finally)**

Recess ended and the school went back to their classrooms. Luckily for Alec, it was time for art. They got to choose what they would like to do – paint or draw as long as everybody drew their class doing something "educational and interesting". Alec and Jane both chose draw and collected their pencil cases from their backpacks. Alec drew his "class" outside the Volturi mansion whilst smiling "people" with black eyes waited in the windows. Jane drew her "class" on the playground, however she sneakily took out her invisible pencil out and began to draw gruesome wounds and vampires feasting on the smiling children, unseen by her teacher's eyes. Checking it with the light on the end of the pencil, and satisfied, the twins handed in their seemingly innocent artworks to the teacher and she pinned them onto the wall. After another half an hour of sitting around waiting for the rest of the students to finish, it was time for music.

Music at forks elementary was different to how Jane had imagined. She thought that there would be a whole lot of kids banging on dusty old instruments sitting in a circle in an attempt to make "music." Or singing out of tune. But it turned out that it was actually for all the kids learnt an instrument to attend their lessons or go to an optional choir practice. It turned out all right for her though – all the music rooms were full except one, which had a battered old piano in it. She sighed in relief, there was no hour of boredom ahead. She sat down at the piano and got a feel for it's keys, surprised that it was excellently tuned, then began to play her favourite piece: Tchaikovsky 's "August: Harvest." Just as Jane was getting into her song, she heard somebody listening outside the door, their heart thumping loudly, and rapidly, an instant giveaway. She nearly freaked straight away, but instead stopped playing as a sheepish looking Renesmee opened the door. Jane's previously happy expression quickly turned into a what-do-you-think-you-are-doing scowl.

"I'm sorry," Renesmee smiled, "but I heard your playing down the corridor and wanted to see who it was. I didn't mean to interrupt you."

Jane didn't drop her scowl, and remained tense in the same position.

"I'm Renesmee, by the way."

"Jane." She mumbled back, nodding in her general direction, praying that somehow the demon spawn would leave without being asked. The now familiar smell of wet dog was becoming quite overpowering. But then she had a brilliant, evil, amazing, super diabolical plan. What if she befriended...it, to visit the Cullen house and further torment that cynical Edward and his madcap wife? Satisfied with her foolproof plan, Jane smiled at Renesmee and began to ask her questions about school, Forks and herself.

Jane and Alec found themselves sitting with Renesmee at lunchtime.

They looked very out of place. The demon spawn and her little friends were all wearing jeans and sneakers with t-shirts and jackets while the twins looked like they had just stepped out of a 1940s commercial with their tidy clothing, shined shoes and neatly brushed hair. While all the children downed cafeteria pizza and fish fingers, Alec and Jane sat with their drink bottles and meticulously unpacked their home-bought "lunches." Nobody seemed to notice that the twins only sipped on their "raspberry cordial" whilst leaving their expensive gourmet lunches untouched. Alec should have known that Heidi would have liked to show off her "perfect mum" skills in an effort to impress the other parents, even if the lunches were pointless – a waste of both money and time. He sat boredly on the end of the table next to his sister – not really listening to her chatting animatedly (and obviously very faked – Alec knew his sister would never speak like that – sweet and shy, when she would enjoy nothing better than to scream and destroy every child at the table and within an eight hundred kilometre radius) with the demon spawn. Alec's eyes widened as he heard the devil spawn invite Jane over to her house after school. He was even more surprised when she accepted. What was Jane thinking? The bell signalling the end of lunch rang out, momentarily interrupting his thoughts. He knew Jane was up to something. As they hurriedly changed their contacts before heading to class (their eyes had turned bright red from drinking the "raspberry cordial" at lunch) and Jane explained her plan to him. They grinned evilly at each other.

"Have fun at the Loch Ness Monster's after school." He laughed.

"Oh, I'm sure I will, Alec. I'm sure I will."

They ran up the steps to the classroom building, eagerly awaiting the end of school.

Jane was allowed to visit Renesmee's house after school on the condition that Heidi picked her up from school – mainly because she wanted to know what Jane's plan was, and she also had to speak to the teacher about the twin's progress.

Alec and Jane didn't need to have their ears pressed up against the door to be able to eavesdrop on the conversation. They sat on the chairs opposite the door, in the now empty corridor, waiting for the teacher's meeting to finish, using their useful enhanced vampire hearing to listen as if they were standing right next to the teacher. "Your children are extremely talented, Mrs Giovanni (Felix had decided on the name, as it was Italian and common in Volterra, but also because of the Pokémon reference), in fact, I think they would find it more beneficial if they studied at a higher level of education. When I quizzed them separately today to get an idea of their progress, I found that both children could quickly and accurately multiply, divide, add and subtract large numbers with ease, their spelling is that of the highest standard, and they are both efficient workers and extremely intellectual and creative."

The twins could imagine the wide smile breaking over Heidi's face as the teacher thought that it was all up to a good solid home-schooled education by Heidi herself. But everything the teacher had said was nothing new. They were intelligent in their human lives, so it was even easier to gain knowledge at a much faster rate as a vampire. Alec knew that he could have addressed parliament in Estonian, Korean, German and Norwegian (both in thought and aloud), recited the dictionary, juggled 12 buses, recite Pi to one million four hundred and twenty seven thousand places and counted backwards from a trillion in the 29.76823497 times tables without having to use the total concentration his mind was capable of. It was part of the reason why he became bored so quickly, not having to put effort into anything mentally challenging. By then end of a long, in depth talk with the teacher, Heidi emerged from the classroom.

"You two," She laughed as they walked out of school towards the impatiently revving Felix behind the wheel of the Ferrari, "couldn't you at least pretend to be normal?"

"This is normal." They replied in unison before climbing into the car.

Felix jammed on the accelerator without bothering to check whether the twins had their seatbelts on. Not that it mattered or would hurt them at all should the car crash (which it wouldn't – Felix was a badass driver), but it would have at least seemed like he slightly cared for their welfare.

The Ferrari pulled up outside the white Cullen house.

"Argh! The white – it burns my eyes!" laughed Alec (who was riding shotgun). Felix rolled his eyes at the immature, but he had to admit, slightly true (well...more than slightly true, comment.

"Ewww. It reeks of werewolf. Yuck!" Jane stuck her tongue out in disgust, but opened the back door of the car and slid out, landing on the muddy ground. Felix got out of the drivers seat to walk Jane to the door. He felt it was his duty to annoy the Cullens even more, as should they attack any Volturi member, then their whole coven would be obliterated before you could shout "look a yellow duckling!"

Taking the chance to irritate Felix further, Jane held his hand (pretending to be nervous about meeting her new "friend's" family) as they walked to the door. He growled extremely quietly under his breath – it sounded like a cough – but obliged to keep up the act. They walked up the stairs and across the porch. Felix rang the doorbell – it was up unusually high so that Jane would have had to stand on her tiptoes to reach it, and also on the side of the door Felix was standing next to.

The loud bell rang through the house, and the vampires on the porch heard a high-pitched scream of excitement from Renesmee. They rolled their eyes. Apart from Alec, Felix had rarely seen anyone this excited to see Jane. They tended to keep their distance. The Loch Ness Monster flung open the door and enveloped a gobsmacked Jane in a massive hug. Already, this was going too far. If anyone dared try this on elsewhere, they would have already been dead. But Jane reminded herself that she had to keep up the act. She couldn't let her masters down. She could see the Cullens and their little werewolf friends staring her down over demon spawn's shoulder. Jane gave them a sweet smile. They knew what the consequences would be if they revealed her little façade or attempted to harm her in any way.

"Goodbye Daddy." Jane said to Felix, hugging him around the waist and wrinkling his perfectly ironed suit. He was extremely alarmed and creeped out.

"I'll.... pick you up at six." He muttered as Alec's snickers could be heard from the car. He turned around swiftly and made his way back to the car before accelerating quickly out of the driveway. Within ten seconds the Ferrari was out of sight.

"Comeoncomeoncomeoncomeon I'll introduce you!" bounced demon spawn, pulling her over to the vampires and werewolves in the middle of the room.

"This is Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, Carlisle, Edward, Bella, Jasper, Esme, Jacob and Seth." They all nodded politely, tense.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Jane curtsied, even though she knew them all.

"Come on, I'll show you 'round." Demon spawn pulled Jane upstairs to show her where everything was. Meanwhile the Cullens had a conversation a few decibels below Renesmee's limited vampiric hearing, which did not slip past Jane's excellent one. As soon as she left the room, Alice said:

"Ohmygod, did you see what she was wearing?"

"Alice," scorned Esme, "You shall not judge someone by what they are wearing. _I _thought it looked precious."

"_You _did." She muttered back.

"That's enough." Warned Carlisle, "There are more serious issues at hand. So far Jane had posed no direct threat to our family. I say that we stay on guard, but don't give her any reason to bother us with Volturi business. Just act as if it was any of Renesmee's friends coming over."

"But, Carlisle." Growled Edward, "You didn't hear the kinds of things she was thinking. If it were up to her, trust me we'd already be dead. I know she doesn't have the level of authority to fight us without bringing serious trouble from Italy, so we should be fine, but do not leave our daughter alone with her. Just in case."

"I agree." Stated Bella, and Jacob shook his head to show his support.

For the meantime though, they would have to put up with Jane's presence.

...

Thanks for reading! I'm not even going to pressure you to review one bit. Even though it is nice. And it would guarantee a quicker posting of the next chapter. Not to mention the fact that I could include some of your ideas if they are appropriate and amazing, or that I could make the story 10 times more enjoyable for you guys, the readers. But I'm totally not like that. No pressure. =)

If you're still wondering why the Cullen's don't just kill Jane because of Bella's nifty shield, or refuse Renesmee's wish to have her come over, here are the main of the possible reasons:

They don't want to attract unnecessary attention to their family – if Jane or any of the other visiting Volturi members were killed, then the Volturi would basically open up war against the Cullens and this time it wouldn't be pretty

They want to protect Renesmee so that she will have a happy childhood rather than worry about the threat of an attack by the Volturi. Also if she knows too much – the Volturi will open fire.

When "Nessie" asked her parents to have Jane over, they obviously didn't ask for the full story and quickly realised who it was. It would look really suspicious if a family in Forks disappeared, as it is a small town. And Renesmee wouldn't want her new BFF assassinated on the spot.

I'm sure I can think of many more reasons – but in the mean time, let your imagination run wild kids!


	3. Chapter 3

Due to the lack of interest, this story is now predominantly closed, as quite honestly, I don't want to spend hours writing a chapter if people won't give me any feedback, who knows, you guys might even hate it and I'd be wasting my time. If you want it to open, REVIEW. Easy as. Don't just click story alert or favourite. It doesn't mean much unless you give the author a review. I'm not just saying this for myself, but for everyone who writes a piece of work on fan fiction, whether it be to your taste or not so. The main point being that just story alerts are so frustrating! I like them, but reviews are the equivalent of online candy. Thanks for reading this rant 


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